Happy Independence Day to all my American Crafties!
I wanted to take the time out to write today and recognize many of the blessings I feel to have been born here. I usually try to lean into the more positive side of things when it comes to my outlook on life and though the past few years have been some of the darkest in my life, there are still many things that I am grateful to God for.
I'll be showing off this month's Super Crafty project as well as a w.i.p I'd deluded myself into thinking I'd be done with by now so let's go!🤣
A many great blessings...
Being online and in the city as I am, there is never a shortage of complaints about the country we're in. I usually just listen quietly and listen being that folks are exceedingly...passionate about their views. That in itself is a privilege not afforded in much of the world and I think we as Americans can take that for granted.
Most of my gratitude is that as a young Christian woman, I was born into the safest region on this earth to be just that. I've had liberties in living my life while practicing my faith and no one really bothers me for it.
I grew up in a very dysfunctional household with a younger mother who, for better or for worse, was very...whimsical. One day we might be living with family, the next we may have been crossing state lines, hopping from homeless shelter to a random friend's couch. Needless to say we were very poor when we weren't living with family and faced a lot of struggles over the years.
From the time I was nine, I basically had to raise my younger brother due to various illnesses my mother faced. After the 8th grade, I was snatched out of school entirely, which broke me in a lot of ways. I'd already been battling moderate anxiety and depression; school had been my refuge for many moons.
I don't know a great amount about existence outside of my country but I have the creeping suspicion that the next part of this story would not have come to pass had I been born anywhere else. Places with different barriers to resources and education and whatnot.
Nothing about my life prior to turning 18 had been made easy and I find myself still mulling over whether that was purposeful or not, but I digress.
When I was 17, I went behind my mother's back and obtained my high school equivalency (it's an even longer story), my obtained score was so high that I got a $3,000 scholarship to take anywhere I wanted. So I took my tush to community college where I had to 100% support all my costs. My grandmother let me live with her so that stabilizing force made it possible for me to work through those 3 years and graduate with honors. During that time, right after I turned 19, I yet again went around my mother and got my first job, despite the hissy fits and discouragement from doing so. Midway of my first degree, I took up a second job to be able to supply my academic and life needs...better?
That three year experience had been so demanding and challenging but pivotal in so many ways. Toward the end of my time in community college, I officially started up Infiniti Crafting Co. in 2018. After walking the stage in 2019, I took a year of "free study" before transferring to Fontbonne University where I yet again graduated with latin honors this past May, 2024.
That's the most abridged version of my story I could put in this post but the moral of the story is this:
Life is rough, nothing is perfect. I got through each year of my life here through prayer and a determination to escape circumstances as they were. In a lot of ways, I've achieved just that. Where I am currently in life, my younger self would not have the ability to believe as I've not only been building things in the natural to get ahead but also the spiritual.
There has been a lot to unpack in my heart of hearts since my mother passed two years ago. A lot of things that will never have closure but, I finally have peace. Which is an odd thing to say. I am grateful to have the opportunity to parse things out and become stronger in my mentality and in my faith and to have the ability to be open about it.
Obviously, things have not gone to plan as far as my business goes and while I have stepped
away, that doesn't mean that I can't pick it up and try again later. Tis the land of opportunity and all that. 😅
When I look at news from around the world and see what other women go through and the persecution of Christians in different corners of the earth, I can't help but to feel humble and grateful to live in a place where my rights are views as natural and God-given. So while most things do seem like they're on fire right now between quality of life and the economy, a lot of my perspective says that I've already seen rock bottom so the only place to go is up.
A "quick" digression...
I know it's been radio silent on all my social media...well except for Twitter, but that's for good reason. June is my normal off month and I usually don't respawn after July 4th. This year has been so very different in that I lost all my steam in early April.
I've spent a long time on the internet, thickening my skin and developing my artistry (circa 2011ish). That being said, I still love what I do and I wouldn't have traded the last 7 years for anything on this Earth.
Toward the end of my last semester, me and my grandmother went through this whole scary ordeal regarding her mobility. As it were, stress levels were high because I was trying to graduate, I was pushing to get my business to sustain itself and the way that my grandma's mobility was so rapidly devolving was scary. In the span of about a month, she went from walking with a cane to having to be lifted out of my car one afternoon and be transported via ambulance. And that was the middle of April.
On top of that, the enemy was being quite...the butt we know he is by sending ridiculous commentary through both my comment sections and my emails to the point where folded. The reason I've been as absent as I have is because of everything I've been dealing with family-wise and on the mental front of it, I no longer saw a reason to continue.
The very though of walking 10ft to my craft space took energy out of me mentally and physically. Specifically it was the email that kicked me where it hurt and while it was just one message out of hundreds of thousands of positive ones, my results for the business were matching up more with the sentiment of that email. So I quit. And I quit early. I could go on a tangent about the defeated way I felt but that wouldn't change the outcome any so why bother?
In retrospect, I feel like a silly goose for letting one thing get to me like that after all these years but ya know what, I was already going through the wringer and decided to control what I could at the time.
My grandmother got the help that she needed and ended up getting neck surgery for it. That whole experience and rehab had her in club med for nearly 2 months. I am elated that God pulled through and that her condition was reversible. She's been my greatest friend and closest ally in life and I couldn't image life without her right now. She's only in her 60's so there's a lot more we have to do together 😁.
While she was out, I held down the fort. I conspired with a cousin of ours and took my driving test FINALLY. And passed that with flying colors. That was another great weight off my shoulders as I no longer had to shell out for rideshares every week. I had my license about two weeks before I graduated and didn't say a word, letting my dear grandma recover in peace. After I skipped across the stage, I went out to the rehab center she'd been transferred to the day before, in my cap and gown.
You would have thought she'd seen a ghost 🤣. But it was a very happy day because we'd missed each other a lot in the near month she'd been in the hospital.
Toward the end of May, we were finally able to start work on my broken front tooth. Lord KNOWS I was probably the happiest root canal patient they'd ever seen. This this injury happened 2 years ago and between funding and competence, it'd been a battle to try and get it fixed. Ultimately, I just feel so overwhelmed (in a good way) about finally getting my life back in that regard. Teaching myself how to chew and speak in my normal way again has been an adventure to say the least but I'm very happy that this will all be done in a few months!
All the good stuff aside, it's been a free fall since May. Being that I am a caretaker, I was out of work for almost 2 months and in a bid to try and make up for that, I applied for 91 different jobs between April 27th and May14th. None of them got back to me and the ones that did were rejection letters. It's not as though I have a blank resume or anything but the only thing I figured was that God had a different plan for me.
The next day, I got an interview for a little something different and I've been in training/prelicensing since then. 🤣
I always say that God's guided my path because of the way doors have opened for me when things seemed impossible. I say its God because I didn't apply for this position, it was nowhere in my spreadsheet or previous emails.
I maaaaay speak more to this in a future life update but I don't want to put my cart before the horse. But do know that because of this I've been feeling really hopeful about my future and being able to support my family.
Current WIP(s)?
Alright, now for the stuff y'all actually open these posts for ✨WIPS✨.
I might be a little guilty of false advertising here... there's only 1 wip here. I'd been brewing in my head since 2021 and out of stress and pure desire to do something with my hands, I started this project back in April.. actually the day before my grandma went into the hospital now that I'm looking at my notes.
For some reason, I thought I'd find stress relief in knitting entrelac with this 1 or 2 weight, 4 ply yarn with some 2.75mm knitting needles. Even more delusional, I thought I'd have my full cardigan and a pattern to share today! 🤣
Well... once the pattern was established (around row 3), the stress relief part came true. I was planning a free pattern release for today but I've been too busy to make that kind of headway on this project. So I'm looking at next year to have this finished and a free pattern for the blog here, fingers crossed!
I fell in love with entrelac knitting a few years ago and actually had intended on making some tutorials on it. That never happened but the designs never stopped. I made a 4th of July top in 2021, and a sweater for my 24th Birthday. My idea was always to go back and revamp that original top pattern for publication but that got postponed too in lieu of other projects.
I've got a lot of ideas and designs written out and I think in the coming months, to years that certain ones will finally get the love they deserve. Right now I'm working on the back panel of a one-size cardigan. I usually will go through a grade for a wider range of sizes but I don't have it in me at this moment. My estimates are that this one should comfortably fit a US 2XL. Things will be less ambiguous when it's done!
I'm going to say right now that *if* I make a video tutorial for this project, it will come much, much later and probably be placed in the Handmade Shop. It has taken me three months to get 12 entrelac rows on this project, I can only imagine what production will look like 😅.
Speaking of long processes...
Coming to Super Crafties this month is a brand new project that has taken far too long to churn out. The concept and pattern itself if super easy and I think the draft has just 10 steps to complete it. Again, this delay was 100% caused my lack of serotonin these past few months and I'm so sorry to have let y'all down.
Last month, I hashed out the final details off what I have named the Kobold Cowl! I know it's a tad warm for winterwear but it's never too soon to do test makes for the Christmas season.
Be on the lookout for this pattern coming sometime this month, the video is currently in production!
Progress to My Return
Today's post was a bit long but I'll end it with this section. Someday when the clouds have cleared a little, I want to incrementally return to tutorial creation. Every now and again, I'll be including my goal progress to reach that point!
I'm not quite sure when, but the Channel Chat podcast will return long before tutorial content. I'm just trying to hash out some stability again before I do that.
Thanks so much for reading and til next time,
Happy Making!
Comments